Family
Spirituality
Families can
get more out of Mass
At Home with our Faith
offered a series of 10 short articles on how your family can get more
out of the Mass. We walked through the chronology of the Mass, from
preparation and gathering through the final blessing and sending forth.
Each month for ten issues we suggested ways that you and your family
can better appreciate how the Mass can deepen and enrich our life
together. What follows are the ten installments.
Saturday night special
A friend told me: "I
remember Saturday night became special when we were called in from
playing, and bath time began. We each took our baths, got in our jammies,
and we either played a board game or watched an old-time movie. It
was the one night we were allowed to drink pop and eat popcorn. It
seemed as if the week had suddenly changed, that time itself slowed
and the outside noise abated and we had this special time all to ourselves
as a family. And so when Sunday morning came, it seemed we were all
in the frame of mind for going to church. Not that we always wanted
to go, but it seemed to flow from the specialness of the night before."
The rituals we enjoy
as a family (even simple ones like reading the comics together on
Sunday morning) can prepare us to appreciate and get the most out
of the rituals we experience at Mass as a parish family. The procession
that escorts the priest up to the altar is preceded by the procession
that begins in our homes, takes us to the parking lot, and has us
greeting friends on the walkways on the way into church. The point
is that you can prepare your family to get more out of Mass by shaping
what goes on in your home the hours beforehand. Your habits and traditions
can signal a special Sabbath atmosphere by how they set this time
of the week apart from what passes for normal.
When I was growing
up, Sundays meant the smell of pancakes and the sound of Broadway
show tunes in the air. Nowadays my daughters and I listen to "Breakfast
with the Beatles," while munching our bagels with a schmear.
The key is that Sunday morning is not like every other morning. Here
are a few examples of Sabbath rituals that might work in your home.
*
Keep Sunday mornings simple. I know this isn’t always easy. As
one of our readers put it, "Families getting young kids to church
must prepare as if for the D-Day invasion." But you can eliminate
some of the typical sources of distraction and disruption: no TV,
no Nintendo, no headphones. You can also change your expectations
about what this day is all about. Be mindful of the people in your
life, not the ticking of the clock or the things you have to do after
church. Try to keep your calendar clear both before and right after
church, to allow you time to breathe. The commands not to work on
Sunday weren’t meant to punish you but to free you.
*
Keep the focus on the family. Starting with Saturday night, select
activities that keep you connected person-to-person: card games,
reading the comics aloud, telling family stories, reading an upbeat
story or Bible story, charades, plays, playing with the dog, doing
crafts, making bread, listening to good music, singing songs together.
*
Do different things and do things differently. Walk to church instead
of driving, have a special breakfast that’s only for Sundays
and holidays, get dressed up (though an obsession with appearances
is counterproductive), or make plans to pick up an elderly neighbor
who could use a ride.
In a very real way,
the gathering rite for Sunday Mass begins at home. At Mass we’re
not just gathering bodies, we’re also trying to gather our scattered
minds and hearts, thoughts, and emotions and bring them together in
a purposeful way before the Lord. Our society moves at such a rapid
pace, with constant activity and constant change. Family life can,
at times, be an antidote to that. Think of ways you already achieve
this. Pat yourself on the back. Now think about one way you can do
it even better over time. And so the Mass begins. TJM
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